Today (Wednesday) our dear daughter Rivkah turns three years old and it is our honor to invite everyone to a birthday party and candle-lighting celebration this Friday at 5:00 pm.
Allow me to share with you a little bit about this custom:
The Code of Jewish Law writes that a child should learn verses of Torah from the age in which he first speaks! It then continues:
"...The age of three marks another milestone in a child's education—at this age it is customary to begin training a boy to wear tzitzit, and a girl to light Shabbat and holiday candles. Children are then taught to recite the morning blessings, the Grace after Meals, and the Shema before retiring..."
In pre-war Europe it was the norm amongst many communities for young girls to light Shabbat candles. It was only due to war, candle shortages, blackouts, etc. that this custom was discontinued. The Lubavitcher Rebbe encouraged the return of this age-old beautiful custom and said that girls should start lighting their own candles (of course, with their parents help and watch!) as soon as they are able to recite the blessing, generally around their third birthday.
Especially today, we live in a world where there are so many negative influences affecting children, even from even a young age. It is therefore all the more importance to instill Jewish values and Mitzvot from the earliest of ages. What better way than having a young girl take part in this beautiful Mitzvah each week alongside her mother.
Rivka's birthday is the 15th of Shevat, the birthday of trees, a very appropiate day for this celebration. For a tree can really show us the importance of the critical years. In a mature tree, a gash here or a torn branch there is of little or no consequence. But the smallest scratch in the seed, the slightest nick in the sapling could result in a flaw which could affect the tree in a significant way. In a similar sense, it is during the youngest of years that we need to protect the tree (child) from weeds (negative influences), give it proper sunlight (an atmosphere of holiness), and water it faithfully (teachings of Torah).