Rabbi Yisroel's Blog

Even Noah had his Doubts

Sunday, October 30, 2022 - 9:36 AM

"But Rabbi, I have many questions..."

"I hate to say it but from time to time I get doubts..."

"Is it OK if some days I have a hard time believing..."

There is an old Yiddish proverb, Fun a kasha shtarbt men nit--"Nobody ever died of a question." It's not the end of the world if you didn't get an answer to all your questions. We can live with unanswered questions. The main thing is not to allow ourselves to become paralyzed by our doubts. We can still do what has to be done, despite our doubts.

That's why Noah always appealed to me. When you read the Torah and its commentaries, he is no “Superhero.” He has his flaws.

Rashi describes Noah as a man of "small faith" who had doubts whether the flood would actually happen. In fact, according to the great commentator's understanding, he didn't enter the Ark until the rains actually started and the floodwaters pushed him in. And certainly, he fell short in terms of the ability to influence others in his generations…That explains why many people look down on Noah, especially when they compare him to other Biblical heroes like Abraham or Moses.

And yet...this is precisely what makes Noah my kind of hero. He's real. He's human.

Look what this simple fellow achieved! In a society dripping with greed and temptation, Noach held strongly to his morals, walked with G-d, and swam against the tide, saving the planet from destruction. Civilization survived not because of a towering, titanic figure; but because of a simple man who had the courage to live morally when everyone around him behaved despicably. He may have had his doubts...but he got the job done!

So Noah, the reluctant hero, reminds us that you don't have to be fearless to get involved. You don't have to be a tzaddik to do a mitzvah. You don't have to be holy to keep kosher, and you don't have to be "perfect in your faith" to come out to a Torah class.

The Kabbalah of Surprise

Sunday, October 23, 2022 - 10:45 AM

Chana went to NJ today for a milestone birthday of her father BH! Her siblings helped organize a special weekend complete with a mini concert, meaningful gifts, and relatives coming in from out of town. But making it even more special? There's just one person who was unaware of the planned event – my father-in-law.

I can't wait to hear the recap of the celebration, especially his reaction to the surprise. And it got me thinking about the nature of a surprise.

There’s something about a surprise that turns the ordinary into something remarkable. How interesting is it that simply because something is unexpected and novel, the experience becomes memorable.

Humor of course works the same way. When does a person laugh? What makes us smile? Laughter is created from the surprise. Comedy is expecting one answer and getting the opposite answer. The art of humor is the ability to create an expectation and then move from it to another place.

Here's the KABBALA behind the surprise:

But first a question: Why does a Jewish day start at night? The answer is right there in this week's Torah Portion. In each of the days of creation, we find that G-d began creating at night, and at the end of the afternoon Hashem closed the day with the announcement: "And it was evening, and it was morning, one day, etc.”

Of course that begs the question -- Who starts working at night? Doesn't a hard worker show up at sunrise? Why does G-d, and thus the Jewish day, start from the evening before?

The mystics give a fascinating answer. Life is all about creating light from darkness.

Life is not a postcard. Life is a startup venture to create a new never-before-seen innovative product. This world is where a person gets the opportunity to be G-d’s partner in the creation of the world! To create something different, surprising, unpredictable, unprecedented, unique that no one did or could have anticipated in advance.

This is one way we humans fulfill the purpose of creation. Hashem had everything above, but one thing he didn't have was surprise and innovation. In creating a world Hashem says 'I am looking not for the perfect person, but for those who voluntarily and unpredictably chooses to write a better version of themselves. That's one reason why the world started dark and gradually became light !"

On Yom Kippur someone told me "Rabbi, just a few years ago never would I have imagined that I would be the type of person to put on Tefilin or be excited about donating to a Jewish cause?"

My response? That makes it the more meaningful.

This unexpected surprise is magical. This is divine.

This, for the Creator, is a greater innovation than designing a rocket ship to outer space.

This is a rocket ship to inner space!

“ And it was evening, and (through you Jew) it was morning —that is what I, G-d, call a day !”

The JOY of Yom Kippur

Sunday, October 2, 2022 - 2:19 PM

I meet too many people who get anxious about, or even dread, Yom Kippur.

I get it. Hours in Synagogue. Fasting. And a machzor full or some intense prayers.

Which makes it easy for some to miss the JOY of the day.

Joy? On Yom Kippur? Yes, yes, and yes.

Yom Kippur is to be viewed as a gift: An incredible opportunity G-d has given us to remove any “shmutz” that may have accumulated throughout the year and return to our pristine natural self. He only asks for us to be sincere in our regret, observe the day as articulated in Torah, and pledge to be better in the future.

What a blessing the day is…

It is therefore important for us to have that conviction that G-d has truly forgiven us and we are a new person that day after Yom Kippur.

Of course, that is easier said than done. Sometimes, shortly after this holy day, we may feel that although we are ready to change, we are still confronted by those negative urges and temptations. I want to share with you a beautiful response to this issue as taught by the Maggid of Mezritch in the form of the following metaphor:

There was a Jew named Moshe that ran a tavern in a small town in Russia. He made a decent living but soon got sick of the atmosphere of a tavern, having to see the things that came out of the mouth of the locals after they had too much to drink.

Eventually, he decided to change his tavern into a grocery store. The problem? Those used to spending the nights at Moshe's place would still show up, banging on the door, asking for a drink. He would have to yell back at them and say, “You got the wrong place – this is not a bar, this is a grocery!" It took some time, but eventually they moved elsewhere…

The Maggid concluded: This is what you have to do: Tell those thoughts that pop in our mind after Yom Kippur. “I am no longer the man I once was. You got the wrong address.” It just takes some time, but eventually they get the point and move away…

The same is true in our relationships to others. It is a gift to have a set day on the calendar with this energy of forgiveness.

Sure, we can apologize year-round but I find it so much easier to make that phone call before Yom Kippur. You even have a script ready to say! "Hi...how are you? I know we haven't spoken much recently... but I've been doing some thinking...and with Yom Kippur coming around the corner, I really wanted to connect with you and...."

What a gift that is to let go of resentment and hurt!

A psychology professor once spoke to an auditorium filled with students about how to let go of guilt. As she spoke, she walked around on stage with a glass of water raised in the air. As she gestured at the glass, everyone expected that she’d ask the typical “glass half empty or glass half-full” question. Instead, she asked them, “How heavy is this glass of water I’m holding?”

Students shouted out answers ranging from eight ounces to a couple of pounds.

“From my perspective,” she replied, “the absolute weight of this glass doesn’t matter. It all depends on how long I hold it. If I hold it for a minute or two, it’s fairly light. If I hold it for half an hour, its weight will make my arm ache a little. If I hold it for a day straight, my arm will cramp up and feel completely numb and paralyzed, forcing me to drop the glass to the floor. In each case, the weight of the glass doesn’t change, but the longer I hold it, the heavier it feels to me. The same is true of holding on to guilt.”

I sometimes stop and think how difficult life would be if there was no Yom Kippur!

On a personal note:

As a Rabbi and Community Leader, it happens that I let people down or offend others. Sometimes people have expectations of me that I am not able to accomplish (at times, due to circumstances beyond my control) and they are upset at me for this. In these situations there is no way for me to ask you for forgiveness because I don’t know that I have offended you. I am giving you full permission to reach out to me over the next few days, to call me or text me or email me and tell me what I have done and give me the opportunity to ask you for forgiveness.

For those who are not able to ask me for forgiveness, I hope you will forgive me in your heart.

May all be forgiven without grudges and may G-d almighty forgive us and seal us in the book of life for a year of Health, Happiness, Prosperity, and Redemption Now!!